Talent Management or Talent Manipulati

Talent Management or Talent Manipulation?
by Jamie and Maren Showkeir

Talent managers have an essential role in hiring and developing organizational talent. Stakes are high in the interview process and during performance appraisals. People are inclined to sell their best qualities to get the job, the raise or the promotion, and talent managers want to ensure the organization has the best possible workforce.

Consequently, both sides may be tempted to use manipulative techniques to get what they want and often don't realize they're doing it. In fact, the tactic is so common and subtle people may not even see it.

Manipulation starts with intention. When you try to get people to act, believe something or feel a certain way without fully disclosing, you're in manipulation mode. Manipulation makes it easier to win in the moment. You can use it to make yourself look better or get results from others.

Recently, we conducted a workplace survey of 250 people from diverse industries and backgrounds that included questions about manipulation at work. The majority of respondents said they rarely or never used manipulation at work to get things done, and neither did the majority feel others manipulated them.

And nearly 70 percent said using manipulation to get things done was unacceptable. Yet four out of five said the people who are best at manipulating others are the ones who get ahead in their careers. The people who responded to the survey included a preponderance of managers, so how can this contradiction exist?

Manipulation is a barrier to authentic conversation. It takes a heavy toll on relationships by destroying trust and fostering cynicism. When people manipulate each other at work, it creates something no one can believe in. In our survey, roughly half of those responding - regardless of position - admit they found it difficult to have open, honest conversations at their company. This problem often starts with the interview process.

Manipulation shows up when talent managers oversell the benefits of a company or give calculated descriptions about what it's like to work there. It can make an impression when future career opportunities are overstated. Manipulation is likely at play, no matter how benevolent or subtle, when motivational tactics are used to create enthusiasm, loyalty or to improve morale.

The talent manager can recognize manipulation. The following are common manipulative techniques identified in the workplace:

a) Spinning the facts or using calculated descriptions that favor your position or ideas. For example: "You asked about my weaknesses. My biggest weakness is that I work too hard. Sometimes my co-workers accuse me of being too conscientious."

b) Overstating the situation or exaggerating threats to create a false sense of urgency or importance to motivate people. For instance: "The biggest difficulty in my last position was every time I took a vacation I got back and had a huge mess to deal with. Nobody there seemed to care as much about our customers as I did."

c) Understating or downplaying difficult issues or serious problems to keep others calm or focused on work. It could sound like: "There were a few times when my boss and I didn't see eye to eye. But if she thought my way was wrong, I was happy to do it her way."

d) Sucking up or going over the top and giving phony praise to have an effect. It could sound like: "I have always wanted to work here. Everything I read and everyone I talk to mentions what a great place this is to work."

Other techniques include feigning interest in something or someone to get what you need, playing to another's emotions, reassuring others without any evidence things will be all right, disguising your agenda, masking your true intentions when asking someone to do something, revealing only the facts that bolster your arguments, using sarcasm or dropping powerful names to get your way.

Without self-awareness, manipulation can show up when and where we least expect it. For instance, viewing those we are hiring and managing as human capital instead of people makes it easier to engage in a strategic dance of inauthentic manipulative conversations. Questions such as "What am I trying to create here?" and "How would I want to be treated?" can help talent managers develop an awareness of techniques to engage in authentic conversations.

Abandoning manipulation isn't easy, but choosing more authentic conversation techniques will strengthen relationships and build trust. Talking about things this way acknowledges an individual's freedom of choice. When we choose conversations that emphasize transparency and honesty, people are more likely to choose accountability and responsibility.

When conversations are imbued with full disclosure of projects and plans, it creates commitment and investment in a shared future. Employees who are authentically engaged from the beginning will produce better results. Conversations that include full disclosure presuppose a faith in people's ability to collaborate and use their intelligence, judgment and goodwill to create a world in which we can all believe. Authentic conversations are better for business.

[About the Authors: Jamie and Maren Showkeir are co-authors of Authentic Conversations: Moving from Manipulation to Truth and Commitment. Their company, Henning-Showkeir & Associates, offers management consulting, change management and leadership development.]

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